It's been a few months since i've blogged.  I guess things have been pretty crazy as of late.  I moved out of my parent's basement (again), I graduated from college, and got a big person job as a recruiter for USU.  Those are all things worthy of blogging about but the thing that brought me back was something that happened tonight while I was at my parent's house for Sunday dinner.

We were celebrating my brother-in-law's birthday as well as the birthday of his youngest son Ben.  Ben just turned two.  He is one of the cutest and happiest two year olds I have ever met.

looking at himself with my iphone camera

He also suffers from seizures.  He's had them for over a year now. He has to wear a helmet because his body constantly jerks causing him to lose control and fall over.  Tonight was the first time I ever saw one of his seizures.

I have worked with people with disabilities for many years and have seen a lot of seizures but for some reason tonight really had an impact on me.  Seeing my little 2 year old nephew lying on his side convulsing and whimpering while his mom and dad knelt by his side waiting for it to pass was almost too much for me to watch.  I just stood and looked into his glazed eyes, praying that he would be ok.

I think it's natural to ask why it has to happen.  Why does such a sweet little boy have to suffer?  Why do his parent's have to stay awake at night wishing there was more they could do to help him?  I wish I knew the reasons why but I don't.  God does though.  And even though I can't begin to comprehend the intricacies of His plan for us, I know that He allowed His own son to descend below all things in order to give us the opportunity to live with Him again.

All of us have a purpose here.  We may get confused at times as to what that purpose is but God will always remind us if we're willing to pay attention.  I wish more than anything that I could trade places with Ben and give him the kind of life that I feel like he should have but I know that he is so much stronger than I ever could be and God has an important plan just for him.

Life is such a crazy journey full of so many unexpected turns.  So often I get caught up in trivial issues that don't really matter.  What really matters is that we are here to learn, love, and help each other experience true joy that can only come through following our Father's plan.

I am who I am because of the people that have come into my life and the relationships and experiences I've had with them.  Thank you Ben for helping me become a better person.  I love you.